#090 – Humorously Speaking (Cheapskate)

When my Taiwanese colleague visits Singapore, I bring him out for dinner with another colleague, Chris. Chris picks the restaurant Brozeit, the beer place, as the dinner place because drinkers just never stop drinking. He is a member at Brozeit. We had a great time together, and not sure why all sorts of complaints flow out our mouths naturally and effortlessly, and well our boss is always the victim. Then I notice someone is celebrating birthday at the table next to us with a cake and a mini sparkling firework candle. My eyes sparkle too! I want that!

Oops, but it’s not my birthday. However, two more days will be Chris’ birthday!

Ah ha!!! Then I take the opportunity to go toilet and ask the waitress: “Hey, that dude (pointing at my ex-colleague) is a member and is having a birthday in two days time, got a complimentary cake for him or not?”

The waitress said: “Wait a moment please… (checking the system), oh yes! He is entitled a free birthday cake from us”.

Without hesitation, I said: “Serve now!!! Serve now!!!!!”. As if it’s my membership card and my birthday!”

The waitress then serves the cake and sings “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to youuuuu!!!”. Everyone sings along.

This arrangement surprises him! Yay!!!

I asked him, “Are you happy for the celebration?”.

He said: “I am surprised and yeah, thanks for that”.

Then I told him: “This is a complimentary cake, thanks to your membership, hahaha”.

He jokingly said: “Cheapskate!”.

He doesn’t mind that, of course, and he has the fun!

Before we leave the restaurant, I hand a credit card to the waitress to pay the bill. And the card belongs to the birthday boy. Cheapskate, guaranteed.

Okay, I do want to at least split the bill but he insists, what to do.

This is a funny story that I think it’s fun to share! By the way, we always use the word “cheapskate”, what does that really mean? Google: “A stingy person”. 🙊

How many of you are a cheapskate? 🤔

I strongly believe you guys are not cheapskates, you know why? Because you guys are willing to pay the highest Toastmasters membership fee in the world to be here. And dear guests, you most probably pay the most expensive guest fee to attend a toastmaster meeting. For this, please give yourself a big round of applause.

My friends, is being a cheapskate good or bad? I guess nobody loves to be called Cheapskate!

But a good thing about being cheapskate is, they are simply unforgettable. When you join a Christmas gift exchange party, everyone is bringing awesome presents, there is sometimes or always a person who brings a big size present, and at the end, it is a cheap “Santa Claus” mug inside the box. And it’s the same mug as last year! I bet there is a buy-one-free-one promotion.

I believe you have tonnes of experience dealing with Cheapskates in your life, especially in this lovely Singapore. Aunties and Uncles are the gurus of cheapskates.  They will always make sure every 1 dollar spent has the MAXIMUM Value. That’s the reason why all the rare promotional items in NTUC are always GONE before we reach them.

From this example, is it bad to be stingy sometimes? I strongly believe we should appreciate how our family and parents are stingy on themselves but always giving the best to us. I, myself, am being brought up by thrifty parents as we are not a rich family, yet I grow up properly, get enough study and become who I am today, thanks to them.

The bright side of being cheapskate can be frugal or thrifty. Warren Buffet, Mark Z, Bill G, they are frugal even though they are crazy rich ang mohs. And some times instead of splurging unnecessarily, we are saving diligently. It’s a good virtue. Just like there are so many parents work hard and save their money just for their kids to have good educations.

Okay, you must be curious how much money I have in the bank? Not going to tell you.

So, ladies and gentlemen, be a conditional cheapskate for the greater good but not to take advantage of others.

My friends love to have me during their shopping sprees, why? because I can help them to maximize what they can gain. For example, buying things at Body Shop, they will say: “Garen GO!” like pokemon Go. Then I will ask the promoters, we are buying this, this and this, can give free gifts? free samples? and free trial? That’s why I am Cheapskate Guaranteed!

So, ladies and gentlemen, I am open my cheapskate shopping companionship to you, call this number 8427 0165 to engage my service, terms and conditions applied. Thank you.

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